JANE LaMAR HAIDER                                  

       
Cliff and Jane Haider pastored the United Methodist Church in Osceola from 1983 to 1992. Cliff’s story is in the 2001 (orange) edition of Recipes for Living. Fallowing is Jane's story:

Bishop Job in his book, A Guide to Retreat for all God's Shepherds, told how congregations attempt to mold the pastors who are appointed to them. This is true also for · pastors' spouses and children. But each of these persons has their own identity molded from past experiences and their natural make-up. Each pastor prepares a profile of his expertise and visions, and Staff Parish Committees prepare a list of their expectations. The Cabinet and Bishop attempt to match the two. Sometimes they match and sometimes they don't.

In my case, I have tried to be and do what was expected of me, but I have had to work around a difficulty with my vision. My eyes simply didn't completely develop, so there is nothing that can be done to correct them. There were probably times when I did things wrong and caused my family to be embarrassed. My mother, with macular degeneration in her later years, told me that she could then appreciate what I lived with all my life. It has hampered me in certain situations and to a degree has affected my self-esteem. I respect what I can do and try to do what I can while knowing my limitations. I have never used it as a crutch.

I grew up in Missouri with four sisters, Mom and Dad. When I was five years old, we moved to the country, and Dad left his position as youth director for the St. Joseph, Missouri YMCA. He became a counselor and principal in the Maryville school system and Mother was a Home Economics teacher in that same system. We girls grew up accustomed to moving to town in the winter and back to the farm in the summer. By the time I was in fifth grade, I had moved 14 times, so moving was part of my life and was no big deal.

Through my lifetime experiences, I have discovered that there is always something to be learned and something good that comes out of every experience. I always attempt to find out what that is. From all the moves, both before I was married and as a parsonage family, I learned that you can have friends wherever you are. You fall in love with people, the good and the bad, and work through it. It has been a valuable lesson not to be rooted in one group of people, and that was reinforced as I have counseled and worked with people throughout my life. I've been able to adjust to and manage my life thanks to my friends.

My mother was a strong influence in my life. She deserves many stars because she wore many hats. Her life wasn't easy but she was a wonderful person, really strong, and she reflected a true spirituality. She was the one who helped me early on with my singing, telling me, "Even if you don't have a great singing voice, remember that it is the message you are bringing," and that is the way I have lived my life for Christ all the way through. It is possible to have a great vibrato and voice qualities, but if you don't get the message across, and you don't live it, it says and shows nothing. When I was a senior in high school, I went to State Voice Contest and that was written on the form that came back. It said, "You may not have the greatest singing voice but you have the greatest message." I received a "1"on the merits of getting the message across. To me that was a compliment. I could forget everything else that was said because that was what I'd been taught as a little girl.

My sister Marylyn was my best friend and strongest companion through my early years. She is 10 years older than I, so every time I hit a milestone hurdle that she had been through before me, I would call her and she would tell me not to worry about that - "It's minor, just keep moving along." It was like that until she hit the age of 60. Then she told me I would have a problem turning that age. She said, "I had to struggle with that one!"

My defense mechanism as a child was kicking.  My sisters and I did fight-that was normal, and I was strong. I used to throw bales of hay up on top of the hayrack. We also helped pick corn, which sometimes we would "accidently'' throw clear on the other side, maybe a little bit on purpose. So it was a normal childhood, growing up in the country, going into town for basketball and music, then coming home, milking the cows and doing the chores. I remember listening to "Sergeant Preston of the Yukon," eating a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, then going out to do two hours of chores, coming in, helping get supper, then going back to town to do whatever we had to do. There were times when my frustrations would build, and along with music, I turned to my horses for release. They would' prick up their ears, which gave an impression that they were listening. They always gave me a nuzzle no matter what I told them, and they didn’t repeat it!

I'd like to have had my boys grow up in the country, but with Cliff’s profession we didn't have that choice. The family has enjoyed some wonderful advantages because of Cliff being in the ministry, but for someone like me it was a restriction to have to live in town.

A lot of things I did in my life were because they were expected or necessary. I wanted to attend United Methodist Central College in Fayette, Missouri and major in Christian Ed, but our family finances didn't stretch that far. I respected my parents' wishes, and instead I went to Maryville, Missouri. In order to finance my college education, I gave 25 to 45 piano lessons every week for college professors and other people, and at least 25 every weekend when I went home.

The first year I stayed in the dorm but I couldn’t take dorm life-I felt too cooped up. This, too, is probably a result of growing up in the country. I need space! I lived off campus and walked back and forth to classes for three years. During the last two years I helped take care of my maternal grandparents so Mother didn't have to come to town to do it. I didn’t regret having to do that. They were wonderful people.

I graduated and went to Colorado for a short time, teaching music in Lamar Elementary School. It was an experiential setting, a new program for Mexican children, teaching language through music. I didn't like it there. I found the curriculum boring. It was a three-month program with the option to stay on but I knew it wasn’t right for me. What I failed to think about was the transition when I came back and began looking for a job.

I worked as secretary for the telephone company in Burlington Junction, Missouri and thought I would be there the rest of the year, but I was there about a month when the vocal music teacher in Hubbard, Iowa was killed in a car wreck and they asked if I would consider finishing the year in that position. I did but I didn't realize what working with junior and senior high youth entailed. I came in right at the time of contests. It was very demanding trying to schedule rehearsals, contests, and concerts when I didn't know the youth and their capabilities. It was necessary to take into account the sports program in which the same young people were also involved. But again, there were serendipities. I met several people who have remained in my life. There was a teacher who became a member in our Humeston church when we were there and we are still strong friends; and a student who became a member of our Council Bluffs church. Their children are the same age as our boys.

I loved the students in junior and senior high, but I preferred teaching elementary children at the beginning of their musical education. When I realized that, I applied for a position in Osceola. I came to Osceola in the fall of 1966 and continued through June of 1969.

It was during that time that I met Cliff. It happened that I was experiencing several disasters. I was renting a small house and something broke and flooded my floor furnace. At school we were taking inventory and doing our requisitions for the next year. I know I was feeling overwhelmed, which was probably why I missed church one Sunday. After the service, a friend, Delores Thornton Sutton, called to ask if I was aware that I had been named as the music leader for a week of meetings that would begin the next night. I resented being taken for granted. I marched down to the church and confronted the pastor, John McCallum. I told him that I wanted to meet the evangelist. If I liked him, I would do it; if not, forget it. Well, it was Jim King, whom I had never met, but he made a good impression. It turned out that he knew Cliff well.

During the week Jim told me about his friend. From the pulpit one night he was telling about the positive experiences of the week. When he had gone home for a funeral that day, he had seen a friend who was receptive to an idea he had shared with him. No one in the congregation but me knew that Jim was giving me the message that we would set up a time when Cliff and I could meet. That was in March. It was not until April 2 that we could synchronize our calendars and get together. From there things moved quickly, and we became engaged on June 26, 1968. I had already signed my contract for the next year, so we were married the following year on August 2, 1969. I remember being somewhat reluctant about becoming a minister's wife because I thought it would be boring. Through the years, Cliff has occasionally asked if life seems boring and we've laughed about it. There was always something new. No routine and no day was ever the same, and often changes were made within minutes.

While I was teaching in Osceola, I was choir director at the Presbyterian Church and attended a Lutheran church with another friend. People laughed about my being engaged to a Methodist minister and attending these other churches, but it broadened my scope for understanding other denominations.

During this time I made many friends. Some have passed on; among them was an exceptionally supportive friend, my administrator Frances Carson. She and her husband were florists, and I remember him giving me an orchid at my very first concert in Osceola. I used to sit in Frances' office, typing stencils of words for songs, and talking to myself as I worked. She said, "I don't mind your saying things to yourself, but when you start answering, I'm booting you out of my office!" For relaxation after everybody left for the day, she and I played guitar and sang together.

The tie remained through the years, and when we moved to Humeston, I was flattered that she drove there to ask if I would consider taking the outpoint at Weldon. Even though I'd had that association during the three years I was in Osceola, there were several reasons why I couldn't accept the offer at that time, and she understood. Fourteen years later, when we moved back to Osceola, she stood at my doorstep and said that there was an opening in the elementary school, but she didn't want me to apply because, "If you teach in the school system where your husband is a pastor, if anyone wants to get at him, they can do it through the school system. I support you, but for your good and Cliffs, I strongly advise you not to apply." I took her advice. That led me into the college area where I became coordinator for adult literacy and reading for the eastern half of Southwestern Community College. I would never have done this under other circumstances, but this, too, led me to acquaintances with people who became friends. It was a good experience.

My first ministry with Cliff was in the Millersburg and South English parish. There was a Millersburg-related experience prior to our marriage. Glenda Bright and I went to visit Cliff for a weekend. Before we were out of bed on Sunday rooming, we heard him on the phone, trying unsuccessfully to replace the organist, who had called earlier that rooming. He finally asked if I would play and I refused, saying that I didn't want to be fifth choice. However, I did play and learned a valuable lesson: It doesn't matter how far down the list you might be; taking the "me" and "I" out of the situation is a valuable lesson. Every experience, good or bad, has been wonderful for what it taught me.

I did substitute teaching in Millersburg. One day an 8th-grade boy found a snake and was excited to show it to me. When I was in 8th grade, some of the boys put a snake under the teacher's desk and it startled her to death, which the boys enjoyed. It encouraged them to continue to play similar pranks. In this instance, I went inside the school and leaned against the wall shaking, but I remembered that it was not a good idea to show any such reactions. Children may be excused for doing these things, but as they mature, we hope they learn that there is a difference between a cruel prank and something just for fun. I've never appreciated practical jokes.

It was in Millersburg that we began canoe trips with the youth, taking them to Ely, Minnesota and foraging from there to the boundary waters. They were to put all their belongings in a pillowcase. We told them ahead of time that there would be: no luxuries, but still the girls asked, "Where are the plug-ins?" These were wonderful, team-building experiences for the youth. One was a 90-pound weakling but his goal was to carry his own canoe. He accomplished that and was so proud. One of the boys got a fishhook caught in his arm and that caused a momentary crisis. It was a heavy responsibility taking care of other parents' children, something people didn't seem to realize. They would often say to us as we were leaving, "Have a nice vacation."

While we were in our fourth year in Millersburg and just before one of our canoe trips, Cliff had been told by the District Superintendent that it would be good for his career if he would move. I could hardly believe my ears when I heard Cliff say that he was going to be gone for a week. During that time, if a move came along that the DS felt he should take, he would trust him. When we came back, we were told that we would be moving to the Humeston United Trinity Parish. At that time the uniting of the Disciples of Christ, LeRoy Presbyterian, and United Methodist congregations had been completed on paper but the details had not been worked through.

It was a great move. When we walked into the Humeston parsonage we discovered the refrigerator was stocked with milk, eggs, bacon, and other foods. This was due to the thoughtfulness of Mildred Hutchinson and her family, and they have remained close friends. One night in choir I realized that I was missing my rings, which I never took off. I ran home and everyone followed. They asked what I'd been doing, and I said I'd made a large pot of vegetable beef soup. I had thrown the peelings out onto the garden. Mildred ran home and got their huge flashlight. We all went out looking for the rings and found them. The next morning, four inches of snow covered the ground. If we hadn't found them the night before, we would never have found them. While there I was the district coordinator of youth. We laughed about the fact that I worked with 13 men, and Cliff, as children's coordinator, worked with 13 women.

I suffered several miscarriages during the early years of our marriage, and some of them happened while Cliff was serving the Humeston church. We were on the way to the hospital during one of them, and Wayne Hutchison was driving. Cliff said, "Can't you go any faster?" Wayne said he was going 90 miles an hour. I was surprised because Cliff never asked anyone to speed.

At the time of one of my miscarriages, I was district youth leader and had some other commitments. It took three to six weeks of calling to cancel or rearrange meetings I was responsible for. Through that experience I came to realize that no one is indispensible. We get to thinking how important we are and then find out that others can do it, too. Both Cliff and I realize that it is more important to develop leadership than to try to do it all ourselves. We like to be able to leave the church stronger than we found it. I had a tough time realizing I couldn't do everything because I was accustomed to doing all of those things. I also learned that you have to let people work from their ideas at their own pace. You should never go into something with only Plan A. You need plan B and C as options.

It was in Humeston that Cliff was given the only set of stoles he has ever had. That was because Lois Kaiser proposed and promoted it as his Christmas gift from the congregation.

There are some problems when churches unite. One of the most difficult in the Humeston situation was the question of which church would be the most efficient to retain and develop as the official church building. Cliff was in his fourth year and all was going well. The DS told him that the people liked him and respected him so much that they were agreeing to do anything he suggested that they might want to try for the church. While that was very flattering, Cliff did not think it healthy for the church and was ready to move on. However, he didn't want to leave anything unsettled. The congregation had decided to retain the former United Methodist building, and was in the process of selling the Christian Church property. When that was sold, Cliff felt that his work had been completed, and we moved on to Rolfe.

In every appointment, there have been memorable experiences. One of those in Rolfe was that, within a six month period, I was pregnant at the same time we had an opportunity to adopt a child. Within two weeks, we lost them both. Emotionally this was traumatic for me and probably the most stressful miscarriage for Cliff.  I didn't realize how much Cliff suffered, but I saw then how much pain be felt.

Stephen arrived November 25, 1978. We first saw him along with probably 35 other people, who knew we were in the coffee shop of the Starlight Motel in Fort Dodge waiting for our attorney to bring him. Talk about a public viewing! There was a meeting in one of the rooms. They stopped the meeting and all came in to see him. That was probably the only time in my life when I couldn’t eat a bagel and drink a glass of orange juice. I was just too nervous. Cliff had to take over and do the feeding and changing when we finally got home. All I wanted to do was watch him. It was just too wonderful!

In July of 1980, we moved from Rolfe to Estherville. Stephen was small and I was pregnant with Clifton who arrived on November 25, 1980. Clifton was jaundiced and had to stay in the hospital an extra six days. When we brought him home we moved him from window to window and kept the lamp on while he slept trying to get the house warm enough for him. Stephen loved Clifton and tried so hard to help. To whichever room we moved him, Stephen followed, making up songs and singing his heart out. When he was in the living room and dining room he added the organ and piano accompaniments to the songs. Those would have been the days to have a camcorder of the two of them.

Clifton was so small and had a pyloric valve problem which meant that we might get him to take a few ounces of food and then he would vomit. He would sleep a few minutes and we would repeat the process. When he was a month old, it was thought he might have to have surgery, but the doctor said that if we could keep doing as we were, he would eventually outgrow it. It was not until he was two years old that he finally could start eating more than three or four spoonfuls at a time. I spent many hours holding him. I wouldn't take anything for those hours with either of the boys. I am grateful that Cliff wanted me to be a stay-at-home mom.

Maybe Clifton needing extra care made other situations seem more difficult. Our first observation was that the parsonage had not been left in good condition by the former pastor. Many times congregations don't realize that they need to stay alert to the upkeep of the parsonage because not all ministers take appropriate care of their living quarters. It makes it hard for every-one when that happens. Also in that congregation were persons who attempted to gain control, which creates a lot of tension. But there has always been, in every appointment, people who were strong and supportive of Cliff and our family and have remained so all through the years.

We were in Estherville three years. In 1983 Cliff was appointed to Osceola. We moved into a wonderful neighborhood-here were John and Jan Lloyd and Roger and Sheila Kentner. I had Roger and Sheila in school, and they lived just across the lots from us. We became really close friends, and our children were like stair steps. Both couples were active in the church.

I became acquainted with Ruth Shultz who lived across the street from us. I'd heard a lot of stories about Ruth. My first encounter was through our dog, Solar. I wanted to border train Solar, so I put her on the leash and took her around with a roll of paper to train her. Ruth saw that and threatened to turn me in for animal abuse. I said, "Ruth, if you will give me three weeks, you will love this dog forever." At the end of the three weeks Solar wouldn't go beyond our yard unless somebody teased her, which they occasionally did, but Ruth would be on her porch and tell them to leave the dog alone. "Either go across the street and talk with her or leave her alone." She was my Number One support person from that time on.

Ruth helped the boys a lot, showing them how to knit, crochet, and other things. Ruth knew that our boys weren't allowed to go trick or treating or to birthday parties. It may have been a bad choice on our part, but it was a decision we made and we tried to make up for it in other ways. One Halloween, for example, we took them to Des Moines to eat out at a Chinese restaurant. Ruth and other neighbors saw to it that they were not deprived. They would give them bags of candy. The police officers were helpful to us, also, letting us know if they had seen one of the boys at this or that place that they thought we might not approve.

In Osceola, Jean Hurd became a wonderful friend and I wanted her to know, along with Ross Frahm, that I was no competitor for positions of organist or soloist. It was my philosophy that my role was to encourage and develop leadership in the church and community, not to take over. I remember Linda Neilson growing in her position as Christian Education Director when her life took on some new dimensions. Interestingly, later when Linda applied for her present teaching job, Cliff wrote a recommendation. The first question she was asked was, "So how is Cliff doing?" The one who asked was Gary Willett who was choir director and his wife the pianist in the Rolfe church. What a small world!

While we were in Osceola I thought about going on to graduate school, but my parents and three of my sisters were starting to have some problems which affected our lives as well. All of us have things happen and, try as we might not to let them change our lives, sometimes they do. At those times we need support groups. One of the strongest was the covenant group which I started with Janice Nannen. She was my prayer partner and remains my confidential prayer partner today. She is one of my very strong friends. Through that support and other people in the community, some who knew the situation and some who did not, I received a lot of strength. But one of my greatest self-esteem promoters was my husband who wisely said, "For your own self-confidence, you need to go back and renew your teaching certificate." I probably wouldn't have done that if he hadn't said I needed to do it for myself.

Lots of things took place in the Osceola church. I was in a rather unusual position, having been in the community before becoming a pastor's wife. Because of my Christian background, I was interested in all aspects of the church. It was hard for me to stay in the background and just be there when I was needed.

Much was accomplished because the people wanted to grow and change and were willing to take leadership. A vote was taken regarding the organ. John Lloyd chaired the meeting and he handled it so well. We were talking about money and changes, and those are hard decisions. However, it not only passed but the Scritchfields and Waid Lentz, who had promoted the idea, were among the first who invested in it. Within two weeks all the money had been raised.

The church was open to community needs - while the new elementary school was being built, some of the classes were held in our church. When the nursing home had a crisis, residents were temporarily housed in the fellowship hall. Several times that area became a shelter for travelers stranded because of winter road conditions. We were able to give camper scholarships because of the generosity of the congregation. We began donating funds for the school milk/ juice program for youngsters whose parents could not provide them. Bill Short was the liaison between the church and school. He and Jan were great supporters. Clifton was in Dedee (Short) and Mike's wedding in a little gray tuxedo. He still has the dog they gave him.

I have fond recollections of people who came through at a time when Cliff was sick in the hospital. I was trying to be there as well as carrying on for the boys at home. I remember John Lloyd coming to the hospital that first night and saying, "Don't give me any argument because it is going to happen anyway - we are taking the boys home with us." They and Julie Wilkens were so helpful to me. Cecil and Marjorie Latta took over for Cliff and served communion. Cecil was not well at that time, but they did it for Cliff. There was so much love for us in that community!

There was a time when Clifton was in kindergarten that he was sent home from school. We still believe that it was because he knew the UMW was serving ham balls for Shirley Woods' mother's funeral. He ate his lunch, had no temperature, so I sent him back. Bev Edwards kind of got after me for that, but I thought he was playing the game. Stephen called one day saying he was sick, so he spent the day and night in bed because we didn't play that game with him either. Maybe because of our diabetic diet, neither of the boys missed school because of sickness.

Our boys grew up with the church being their family. They cared very much about their church family and hurt when family members hurt, or because of some of the political things that happened in the church structure. To them it was serious and personal.

There is no way that I could mention all the people that come to mind when Cliff and I think of Osceola. There was Leona Eddy whom the boys called their grandma and Martha Snell who drove me around saying, "I'm going to show you some of the places you've never been." It was a joke between Julie Wilken and me that we always did the Younker's blouse sale and found things that were alike. Dennis could tell many things about caring for our family - horror stories, like how many times he sewed up Clifton. There was the time Clifton fell out of the tree. Dennis said, "I've got good news and bad. The arm is broken but it's a clean break."

I think of Melanie and Brian Eddy taking care of the boys one evening. Melanie didn't know we had a cat. Obsidian came out from under the table and nearly scared her to death. She wondered what other animals we might have lurking around. There was the time somebody lured Solar out of the yard and she went uptown. Jan knew Solar didn't belong out of the yard, and she and Brian brought her home. Another day Jan brought popsicles to the whole clan that lived in the neighborhood. As she turned onto Fillmore Street off McLane, she was hit by another car. I thought how unfair. She was doing something good and then had an accident.

One of the Osceola families that went through tough times while we were there was Celeste Jackson's. LeRoy died during that time. He was always kidding with the boys about giving them a knuckle sandwich. Tim went with us on one of the Heifer Project trips. On the way he got a cut on his head, and we had to call Celeste from Kansas City for permission to get, stitches put in.                             

My cousin Elizabeth's health deteriorated while we were in Osceola. We brought her to town and put her in Casual Living. She had meant a lot to me all through the years. She had been so vivacious - a lot like my sister Marylyn.  I hoped she would be able to do things with the boys and that wasn't possible. Her instability increased and soon I was running down there early mornings and otherwise. It was hard. I wanted to help her and didn't realize that my family was sacrificing. When we moved her to Council Bluffs three weeks before we moved, she went down several levels. Stephen realized her inabilities. One day I saw him backing her car long before I knew he could do such a thing. I nearly died, but he told me that if he hadn't, she said she was going to, and having watched her drive down a street the wrong way he considered it was the lesser of two evils. Elizabeth was living in Perry when she died in the fall of 1998.

There were several sadnesses in our life while we were in Osceola - the boys lost all three of their remaining grandparents. Cliff’s mother died in May, 1985; my dad died in January, 1986; my mother died in December, 1989.

Cliff was diagnosed with diabetes in 1972. He went to Iowa City to learn how to do what was necessary. He had been on insulin a short time when we went on the canoe trip, so we had taken stuff like chocolate bars. I remember running back to camp for the chocolate bars and couldn't ever find them when I needed them. We were so young and knew so little about diabetes.  Sometimes I called Dennis Wilken in the middle of the night saying, "What shall I do?" and he would say, "Get some orange juice down him. Do something." But he was so kind.

I was working at Bethphage when Fern Underwood called me to say Cliff was at her house but something was wrong. She tried to persuade him to let her take him home but he insisted on driving, so I told her that I would go home immediately. Fern met me as I was running home. She took me home where we checked his blood sugar. It was very low, and we took care of it. Cliff always took good care of his diabetes basically because he is a disciplined person, but also because he had seen and dealt with so many diabetic complications in other families.  With the new technology now available for diabetics, Cliff has been on an insulin pump for over a year. He has more freedom to do as he and/or we like, in that he doesn't have to be as rigid about mealtimes. The pump allows constant control and he adds only when he eats and even then only for certain times. It is amazing and wonderful for him!

Our ministry in Osceola was long and good. So many people in the church were supportive, not just for us but for each other. Linda Bachman and I worked together doing the Christmas programs. Bill and Patsy Holst were special friends. We were always welcome at their home. They went to camp and cooked for us. The leadership and skills provided by these people are tremendous! I remember Shirley Woods, and Glenda Bright, a constant friend from college. We still stay in contact with Gerry and Charles Phillips. They stopped to see us when they visited their cousin Emma Riddling who was in our Council Bluffs church.  Our paths have often crossed with Darrell and Vicky Mateer. There was a time they were coming to see us at the camper.  Vicky kept telling Darrell to turn off Exit 141 instead of Exit 127, highway 141. They traveled some extra miles that trip.

There came a time when we began noticing that the boys kept taking dog food. One day as we were coming home we saw a little white cat sitting on our steps. Cliff said that it could be in the garage. After a certain length of time, kitty litter was provided and Cliff said it might as well move into the house. It had been abused and abandoned, and it became part of our family. When we were packing to move to Council Bluffs, the cat kept meowing, and we would often find her in one of the boxes. It was after we had moved and were settled in that the cat knew she was then part of our family.

Our move to Council Bluffs wasn't as good as it could have been but it was there that Cliff met his travel buddy, Roger Coffey. For me the move was helped by knowing that a former student and family from northern Iowa lived there. Additionally for me it was helped by friends who knew I might need a chocolate fix and gave me 10 to 20 pounds, which was humorous but meaningful. The boys didn't really want to move, but they took with them the rabbits Elbert Weaklend had given them and taught them about the care they needed. We had to get rid of the rabbits during our second year there because the boys became too busy to attend to them.

In Council Bluffs our family had the opportunity through junior high instrumental music, to meet Richard Holmes. He was so good with the boys and did so much for Clifton especially on his jazz and improv. I accompanied a lot of his solo contests and as recently as this fall I was back to visit and enjoyed watching and listening to the way he worked with his students.

In July 1995 we were moved to Keokuk and had the opportunity to live on the Mississippi River for two years.  I was able there to get back to teaching. I didn’t apply for it but just two days before school started, they called to say they understood I was a music teacher and wondered if I would take pre-school through fifth grade vocal music and fifth grade band. I had never taught band or worked with pre-school except for preparing material for Sunday School classes. I was teaching literacy in the Southeastern Community College, but after a conversation about what this new opportunity entailed, I agreed. However, that was the year we moved to Minburn so it was only for a year.

Stephen graduated from high school while we were living in Keokuk. We were there two years, and we continue to keep in touch with friends by e-mail and letters. On July 1, 1997 we moved to Minburn, glad to be back in the central part of Iowa. That put us close to Cutty's, where we have a seasonal camper and where the family spent many summer vacations.

When we first moved to Minburn in July, most of the teaching positions were filled, so I took a teacher associate position which acquainted me with lots of the children and adults in the surrounding area. This allowed me to walk to school and Clifton could drive the 13 miles to Adel to the ADM high school where he took his junior and senior years. The nice part was that Clifton never abused the car privilege. When he said he was going to be somewhere, he was. We rarely worried unless he was coming home later than usual and there was ice or snow.

The second year we were in Minburn, I took 100 hours of training in working with children with autism in order to work with students at Woodward. I got my certification, but that wasn't my calling so I finished the year as Head Start family liaison for the northern Dallas County Head Start. That was in 1999, Clifton's senior year in high school. He achieved his goal that year, going to state in wrestling. It was great to see him wrestle at Veteran's Auditorium.

The Catholic school in Perry asked if I would teach the next year in two schools that were sharing a music teacher. So I taught vocal music in kindergarten through middle school in Perry and Granger, and computer in both schools.

Sometime during our tenure in Minburn, Stephen acquired a cat named Leola that he rescued when a friend was going to put it in an animal shelter. In one of his moves, Stephen wasn't allowed to have him, so he brought Leola home along with a big dog, which we gave to a farmer. Now the cat is doing fine and has taken over the house.

During our fourth year at Minburn, I commuted to teach vocal music in Des Moines at; Douglas Elementary School. It entailed getting up at 5:00 every morning and going to bed at 1:00 a.m. I loved it, but Cliff was ready to retire and asked that I not continue teaching full time. I agreed. He is working part time in a funeral home. He enjoys it and I've begun to be involved in other things.

It has been a busy year. Stephen came home in January 2002, having decided that the interior design business was not going to be profitable right now with everything that is going on in the economy. He is now with us in Des Moines, working at Boesen's Florists again and loving it. Today is February 22, 2002, Clifton's week for intramural wrestling for the University of Iowa. His studies get tougher and tougher every year. Stephen took his computer over to him so that he will not have to leave his room for its use.

I've tried to do more reading. I need to practice reading and piano more than I do. Life continues to be really interesting. Lots of changes still. It is amazing how many people have touched our lives and whose lives we have touched. A lot of things related to Christ happen every day. Ministry never stops. We went to the wedding this summer of the oldest son of one of our Humeston families, whose boys are the same age as our boys. It seems like only yesterday that Cliff performed their wedding and I sang. One of Barb's sisters lives in Des Moines and we have been getting better acquainted since the wedding. A gal that was one of our very first campers in Minburn has called several times. We've had a ministry with one of Cliff’s first members in his very first church, which is additional confirmation that the world of touching and reaching out doesn't stop.

A member of the church we have been attending most of this past winter is a person with whom I have crossed paths over the years. She was not on my "favorite" list, but with prayer and much amazement I have been able to discover positive things about her which are slowly replacing my negative thoughts. Healing is taking place. I am so thankful that God has allowed this circumstance of life to help me face this situation and deal with it so that it can be resolved for me.

I correspond with friends primarily by email, and this morning I had one from the Ogans. I had their children in school and gave them piano lessons. One of the most impressive things has been to read about people's lives in Recipes for Living. Leland Hunt's story reminded us that he, Adrian and Irene Fuller went with us when we went down for my parents’ final sale of their household things. That was an eventful experience which none of us will ever forget. The things people have done in the spirit of friendship mean a great deal to us.

Joys and sorrows. That is what life is all about. Things happen for a reason. We don't know why, but my hope is that my life will always reflect a smile and praise to God no matter how bad things seem to be. I know that, without God, I would never have gotten through the tough times. I hope I can show people how necessary God is in all our lives.

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Last Revised August 20, 2012